Mental Health Day

So about this time I would normally be into my 2nd hour of work but today I'm lounging about in my BYU Snuggie watching endless hours of Netflix.

I put in a vacation day at work, hoping to get some things done and go back home and see my folks.

Then came the flurries...

The snow falling outside has really put a damper on my plans for a vacation day but as I'm popping another bag of popcorn and enjoying myself for the first time in a while, I can't really argue a better way to spend an afternoon.

Somedays we just get caught up in life. We are constantly striving towards that next pay check or that next quiz, slaving away at work or school, feeling like every part of our being is constantly in motion and if we stop, even for a moment, the balance of the universe will be disrupted.

Breathe for a moment.

Maybe you need to look back on your Brainflix and playback some positive memories.

Or maybe you just need to ask yourself permission -- just for one day -- to not be the responsible person and enjoy yourself.

Tomorrow the roads will be clearer and I can safely navigate my way back home and finish everything i intended. And come Monday I will resume my usual work schedule of 3pm to 11pm.

But today, for just today, I will take a mental health break. And love every second of it.

Results and Perspective

So I actually completed my assignment yesterday and I have to say: it was AMAZING!

You know how some days things just seem to fit in place all nice and perfect? That's what yesterday was like, only it was real. 'Twas incredible.

So this whole exercise made me think about my perspective over the last few days in a whole new light and I realized something: your outlook going into situations  really can influence you for good or for worse.

After the events of Wednesday evening, I had already gone to that place of anger.  No amount of Brainflix could've salvaged that because I had already chosen to be angry. And, as a result, the rest of my  Wednesday grew terrible as well.

Last time I let that happen!

In the great words of Professor Dumbledore from A Very Potter Musical, "The audience will be cheering for you or the dragon, but either way they'll be making some noise."

Perspective is key.

Have a good day everyone!

Confession Post #2: The Voice

Hey guys! So I had a friend come up and hang out yesterday. We spent most of Sunday contemplating whether or not to clean out Five Below's entire inventory and recorded some of the most hysterical videos on her Mac webcam.

But the coolest thing we did was an acapella cover of "Call Your Girlfriend" by Robyn.

I've put a link in a separate post. Go there now and watch it!

We're pretty awesome, right?

Confession #2: For a long time, I actually hated listening to myself sing or talk.

Growing up I can remember a lot of times were I was teased by other kids for sounding like a girl when I both spoke and sang.

Can you think of a more brutal way to criticize someone?

I mean, there are lots of little things I can do to change myself over time.

Bad breath? Gum or mouthwash.

Body odor? Shower/bath/deodorant.

Unibrow? Shave/wax it off.

Unsightly mole? Surgically remove it.

The sound of my voice though? Umm... I'm not sure how to remedy that one except by vowing to never speak or sing in public ever again.

Confession #3: Although I've done church choirs pretty much all of my life, when my family moved to Virginia in 2002, I didn't publicly solo or duet for 6 years.

I actually really liked singing and I purposely kept it hidden for that long all because a handful of people didn't likely the way I sounded.

The ONLY reason I finally busted out of that crazy way of thinking was due in part to 2 girls who found out that a.) I could sing and b.) Encouraged/forced/supported me.

So when the school talent show came along my Junior year I found myself on stage singing "A Whole New World."

And believe me, it was definitely a whole new world to me: people actually liked listening to me!

After that, I went on and performed in two musicals and recorded a lot of Brainflix videos that I will cherish forever.

So what about you guys? Is there any part of you that you used to dislike or keep hidden? Share it with me so I don't feel alone!

And who knows? Maybe someone else will benefit from it also!

Brainflix to the Rescue!

I love most aspects of my life. I have a great job, a loving and supportive family, some awesome friends/coworkers and a metabolism that still allows me to eat whatever I want and not gain weight. But there is one thing I do not like:

My subconscious inability to let go of the past.

I imagine it like a black storm cloud that hangs above me all the time, like a proverbial sword of Damocles poised to fall and strike.

Which it does occasionally.

I could be reading a book, alone and totally absorbed in the story when it happens. No warning or early detection. Just a thought or a memory of the past that attempts to divert my attention.

Most days they come, irritate me and leave just as quickly as they arrive...

But somedays it feels like a single spot in my head that doesn't allow my brain the authority to call security.

Last night I had one of those instances.

I was working when I was reminded of the time when my family moved to Virginia. I was a shy kid, didn't know a single soul (aside from my little sister) in our new elementary school and everyone in Virginia talked with a funny accent!

Needless to say, I didn't speak much my first day. I ignored direct questions, I kept to myself and when I arrived home that day I realized that I had acted pretty dumb. After all, how was anyone going to get to know me if I didn't speak?

So the next day I decided I was going to be more open and actually hold conversations and answer questions about my previous life before Virginia...

But you only get to make a first impression once and most of the school had written me off as "the silent guy." It took me a few days to have anyone besides a teacher speak to me and it was all my own doing.

This single memory has the most profound effect on me because it very well could have shaped my entire future in that school system. What if I had answered those questions on the first day? What if I chose not to be loner? How different would my life have turned out?

Last night I asked myself those same questions for the millionth time and my response was the same: Time for Brainflix!

Like my own personal Netflix, I have, in my mind, one of the largest collections of on-demand videos ever assembled via memories. It has a little bit of everything: high school coming of age stories, dramas and a large quantity of musicals and comedies.  And without all of my life experiences and crazy misadventures, how could I have ever accumulated such a collection?

Last night, I replayed my high school concerts and performances in band, my stint as an actor in drama, crossing the finish line to my first race in track and my graduation day. No matter how differently my life could've been, I wouldn't trade these memories for all the money in the world.

So my storm cloud disappeared to do battle again another time. And when it does, I will be ready with popcorn.

It is inevitable that everyone will have at least one bad day in their life. And in those instances, when the very forces of karma and nature are attempting to drag you down, what will you battle them with? For myself, I choose Brainflix.