You're Not Alone!

With the weekend coming to a close and the prospect of a lazy, Monday holiday on the horizon, I've had the opportunity to just relax, which I still find unnerving. In the last few months leading up to my return to academia, I worked both a part-time and full-time job. Any form of "relaxing," usually consisted of me sleeping for the five hours in between them. And since I've been in Utah, I've only had more idle time to waste, which I've regrettably filled with meaningless television and video games. However, I have a job interview on Tuesday (I'll keep you all posted) about which will (hopefully) result in more productive evenings for myself.

In other news, I just wanna thank you guys again for the birthday wishes! I really appreciate it! 'Twas a totally awesome day, filled with sushi and delicious birthday cake!

So, let's start with this day's post...

I recently had a chance to re-watch the movie Captain Phillips with a friend. For those of you who haven't heard of it and want to know more (I mean, it's got Tom Hanks in it and he gets hijacked by Somali pirates; kind of an awesome plot line) you can view it's IMDB page here.

During the course of the film, there's a part when Tom Hanks' character, Captain Rich Phillips, is set adrift at sea with only his pirate captors on a lifeboat. And even though the Captain's crew is following closely behind them -- via cargo ship -- it becomes increasingly apparent that he is alone and his chances of survival were rapidly dropping with every passing moment.

I think we can all relate to the Captain's dilemma. In life, we sometimes find ourselves in uncertain situations where the likelihood of us making it out unharmed seems nearly impossible. And even though we have support standing by, our own loneliness sometimes blinds us to their presence.

But the good Captain was not alone! In fact, three US Navy Ships AND a team of Navy Seals were also dispatched and en route to intercept the pirates and rescue him, which they did successfully!

Can you imagine being freed from that chaos and seeing the extent of your rescue party? Would you think that you -- a small, insignificant citizen of Planet Earth -- would be worth the trouble of mobilizing navies and special ops?

I firmly believe there is very little humankind would not do for each other. And whether you believe in a Higher Power or not, I think someone is aware of your troubles and somewhere there's a rescue party on stand-by awaiting the call to assemble and save you.

Take my new roommate Terry, for instance.

This guy is incredible. He's a Psych major here at UVU and he's got the uncanny ability to read body language accurately. He's the kind of person who will stop you in the hallway, ask you about your day, and just give you a hug because he knows something is amiss but won't ever intrude and ask you directly about it. When I was going through my roommate drama earlier in January, Terry would occasionally text me or drop by my apartment. Those visits were random, but they were perfectly timed events that definitely helped me out when I felt alone and isolated.

Then there people who have always been there, like my second cousin Melissa.

To be truthful, I didn't actually know Melissa before I moved to Utah. She was just another relative my mother would randomly discuss who also happened to go to UVU. During the aforementioned roommate drama, I would sit in my apartment and just waste time alone. But all that would change when a five foot tall girl, accompanied by all her roommates, came to my door one evening and said:

"Hey... I'm your cousin and I live upstairs... Wanna hang out?"

And we've been hanging out ever since.

There are lots of people like Terry and Melissa in the world, waiting in the wings to be needed. We just need to be open to them. And maybe, one day, we can be needed for someone else.

Thanks for Being (Dis)Courteous!

Anyone who knows me fairly well (or, at least, anyone who has added me on Facebook) knows that I have a soft spot for movies. When me and my sister were living together (July 2011 to November 2012) we frequented the cinema no more than 20 times. We know its absurd, but we love it. (And we looove some freshly popped, buttery popcorn.) 

Aside from the movie theaters though, I've also developed a sort of addiction to Redbox. Who honestly hasn't been sucked into renting a movie through them? At $1.20 per night, it's a ridiculously cheap option, especially when compared ALONE to the price of movie tickets. 

My problem though? I never return them the next day! 

I don't know why, honestly; it's not a particularly hard thing to do. I just... Forget.

And so we segue into my story: 

Here I was, with 3 DVDs being rented out more than 2 days ago, driving to the nearest Redbox kiosk to return them.  When I arrive there is a mother and son in front of the machine. Not wanting to crowd the sidewalk -- we were outside a CVS -- I turned off my car and waited for them to finish. Let me repeat that: waited for them to finish. 

Approximately 12.75 seconds later, a larger man, clutching 3 DVDs in one hand and a lit cigarette in the other, comes around the corner and stands behind them. 

From my car, with the driver side window down, I made several observations about this particular individual. 

A.) He was standing very close to this woman and child. 

Now he wasn't grinding up on them or checking their heads for lice, mind you. But this presumable stranger was definitely within touching distance and invading their personal space. 

B.) He was growing visibly pissed off with every passing second. 

I'm talking toe-tapping, exasperated sighs, pacing, excessive wristwatch checking and tongue clicking!

C.) He kept blowing his smoke in their direction, like by doing so  they would leave quicker. 

Who does that?!

When the mother/son duo leave, he angrily deposits his videos and storms off in a huff. 

I checked my dashboard clock: No more than 3 minutes had gone by since he first got in line. 

Now, dear reader, I must ask you: Was that not possibly the most discourteous thing imaginable? 

The world is full of rude individuals. Everyday you see fewer people holding doors open or tipping waiters and help staff. How often do you hear strangers exchange hellos or good-mornings anymore? Some individuals get so caught up in themselves that they forget that there's 7 billion other humans on this planet and each of them deserve the same universal respect and courtesy. 

Be kind and considerate to each other. 

And maybe, just maybe, we'll make the world a better place. One act at a time. 

Thanks for reading. Remember to subscribe to my blog and LIKE it on Facebook!

The Fair-Weather Friendship

Have you ever contemplated the friendships you have forged in life? Those special connections you've made with others, regardless of time and location, that never seem to cease from existence? Have you ever stopped for a second and contemplated how those ties came to be? 

In preparation for this post, I made a list of some of the different ways and circumstances I have forged friendships in my life. 

• We went to Church together and therefore spent at least twice a week hanging out at religious functions

• We had similar teachers in school and college and fate brought us together. 

• We were dysfunctional roommates that, for whatever reason, really liked pretending to hate each other in public and yet would spend hours of the night talking about life, our purpose in it and our dreams and aspirations for the future. 

• We were in Band Class and therefore a musical family for life. 

• You took pity on me and my lack of social interactions at Boys State of Virginia.

• None of us knew how to speak Spanish so we formed a study group. 

• We met in a Remedial Algebra Class and connected over our mutual dislike for math. 

• We formed a go-to squad for projects and assignments at Governors School that will forever be known as the "Dream Team". 

• We worked together and spent a portion of the day shooting the breeze, talking about everyone and everything you could possibly talk about while simultaneously keeping up with work demand. 

• We all went to a Halloween Party, spent the better part of an hour taking pictures all around Campus in our costumes, discovered we all had an appreciation for Harry Potter and Snuggies and spent 2 hours bumming WiFi off the freshman dining hall watching half of A Very Potter Musical. 

• You added me on Facebook and we chatted about Random Acts of Kindness, schoolwork and my laundry basket, which you then insisted on seeing in person and we spent another 3 hours just talking about our First Year Worries and Expectations. 

• We would go to Denny's (or IHOP) for a gathering of food, gossip, an account of our life the previous week and our plans, hopes and fears for the future. 

As I looked at this list, I began classify those friends and friendships into a pretty definitive list. Some of my classifications included: 

Millennial Friends: A friend that you may be separated from either, be it time or location, but when you are together it's as if your life was just merely paused while apart and resuming where it left off. 

Facebook Friends: People you know in real life that you can hang out with or speak to on a regular basis but for whatever reason choose to communicate more often via Facebook (through posts, messages, chat, etc.) and never in reality. 

School Mates: The friends you were always connected with in school but, now that you've graduated and moved on in your lives, you hardly hang out or make time to talk. 

For the most part, my classification system only has positive labels. 

But there is one taxonomical category that I reserve for special circumstances. 

Fair-Weather Friend: A friend that only speaks to you when they want something or when it's convenient for them. 

As you read this, you've probably had a few names come to mind for different terms. You may have even started mentally labeling your own relationships! 

I need you to stop that. 

Empty your brain, take out all the preconceived thoughts you've had within the last few moments. Completely drain your mind of bias and get ready for some brutual honesty and truthfulness. 

Because this isn't a post about the friends in your life. 

This is the post where you decide which label you've earned by your friends. 

Think about it: 

• Do you treat your friendships like one-way alleys or two-way streets? 

• Do you think you're dependable and responsible enough to be called upon by some of your friends? Or are you never considered because you're flakier than Kellogg's cereal? 

• Do you ever think to yourself, "I could probably call so-and-so today..." but always cast the thought aside because you can never make the time to do so?

• When was the last time you reconnected -- and I mean really reconnected -- with an old classmate?

• How many of those cyber friends do you see in reality and how often do you actually strike up casual conversation with them? 

• In short, would you want to be friends with yourself? Because as I'm writing this, I can't help but think I'd hate being my friend!

Our lives are short and relatively unknown. Death comes unannounced and Life has some pretty wicked ways of knocking us around. We constantly find ourselves shuffling between moments of clarity and periods of turmoil. 

But when we have people stand with us in those moments of uncertainty, to help stabilize our resolve and foundations, sometimes that makes all the difference. 

So, what's the lesson of the day? Be the friend you want to have. Because when you need someone to support you in times of trouble, you're gonna want to have a group to call upon and not be left to your own devices. 

Mental Health Day

So about this time I would normally be into my 2nd hour of work but today I'm lounging about in my BYU Snuggie watching endless hours of Netflix.

I put in a vacation day at work, hoping to get some things done and go back home and see my folks.

Then came the flurries...

The snow falling outside has really put a damper on my plans for a vacation day but as I'm popping another bag of popcorn and enjoying myself for the first time in a while, I can't really argue a better way to spend an afternoon.

Somedays we just get caught up in life. We are constantly striving towards that next pay check or that next quiz, slaving away at work or school, feeling like every part of our being is constantly in motion and if we stop, even for a moment, the balance of the universe will be disrupted.

Breathe for a moment.

Maybe you need to look back on your Brainflix and playback some positive memories.

Or maybe you just need to ask yourself permission -- just for one day -- to not be the responsible person and enjoy yourself.

Tomorrow the roads will be clearer and I can safely navigate my way back home and finish everything i intended. And come Monday I will resume my usual work schedule of 3pm to 11pm.

But today, for just today, I will take a mental health break. And love every second of it.

A Challenge of WILL and WON'T

As much as I love to dwell in reality, sometimes I fantasize that I'm a drifter -- untamed and unbound by emotions or human ties. I like to think that I'm unpredictable and mysterious.

But with fantasy aside, the truth is I know myself too well.

I know that I will always put off doing laundry until the last minute because I have extra clothes. They may not even fit right or be the nicest looking, but I know I have them and will wear them out before I wash anymore.

I know that I will always put the emergency brake up when I park a car, much to the annoyance of anyone who drives after me.

I know that I will, at some point today, say the phrase "you learn something new every day" because I always do.

And yet, on the flipside, I also know some not-so-great things about myself.

I know I will curse while driving down the road because of something another car/driver did.

I know that I will probably not get out of bed until an hour or so before I leave for work.

I know that I will more than likely doubt myself or my abilities at least once.

You are the world's greatest authority on yourself. After all, who knows your habits or mannerisms better than you? At times it may take others pointing them out before we notice them ourselves, but for the most part you are the only one who truly understands the reasons why you do the things you do.

So today I'm going to try something new. Seeing as I know what I will do, I am going to challenge myself to do things I normally don't do.

Today I will smile more. (Apparently I grimace. A lot.)

Today I will strike up a conversation with someone I have never spoken to. (Most days I keep to myself.)

Today I will make and accept sincere compliments. (A tough one for myself.)

I will report back tomorrow on my success or failure. Until then, have a good day everyone!

Brainflix to the Rescue!

I love most aspects of my life. I have a great job, a loving and supportive family, some awesome friends/coworkers and a metabolism that still allows me to eat whatever I want and not gain weight. But there is one thing I do not like:

My subconscious inability to let go of the past.

I imagine it like a black storm cloud that hangs above me all the time, like a proverbial sword of Damocles poised to fall and strike.

Which it does occasionally.

I could be reading a book, alone and totally absorbed in the story when it happens. No warning or early detection. Just a thought or a memory of the past that attempts to divert my attention.

Most days they come, irritate me and leave just as quickly as they arrive...

But somedays it feels like a single spot in my head that doesn't allow my brain the authority to call security.

Last night I had one of those instances.

I was working when I was reminded of the time when my family moved to Virginia. I was a shy kid, didn't know a single soul (aside from my little sister) in our new elementary school and everyone in Virginia talked with a funny accent!

Needless to say, I didn't speak much my first day. I ignored direct questions, I kept to myself and when I arrived home that day I realized that I had acted pretty dumb. After all, how was anyone going to get to know me if I didn't speak?

So the next day I decided I was going to be more open and actually hold conversations and answer questions about my previous life before Virginia...

But you only get to make a first impression once and most of the school had written me off as "the silent guy." It took me a few days to have anyone besides a teacher speak to me and it was all my own doing.

This single memory has the most profound effect on me because it very well could have shaped my entire future in that school system. What if I had answered those questions on the first day? What if I chose not to be loner? How different would my life have turned out?

Last night I asked myself those same questions for the millionth time and my response was the same: Time for Brainflix!

Like my own personal Netflix, I have, in my mind, one of the largest collections of on-demand videos ever assembled via memories. It has a little bit of everything: high school coming of age stories, dramas and a large quantity of musicals and comedies.  And without all of my life experiences and crazy misadventures, how could I have ever accumulated such a collection?

Last night, I replayed my high school concerts and performances in band, my stint as an actor in drama, crossing the finish line to my first race in track and my graduation day. No matter how differently my life could've been, I wouldn't trade these memories for all the money in the world.

So my storm cloud disappeared to do battle again another time. And when it does, I will be ready with popcorn.

It is inevitable that everyone will have at least one bad day in their life. And in those instances, when the very forces of karma and nature are attempting to drag you down, what will you battle them with? For myself, I choose Brainflix.

Hello World! Hear My Voice!

Hi everyone. My name is Michael and I'm a 21-going-on-22 year old guy living in Virginia. I work full-time and I have no life outside of it... Sad right?

The main thing I wanted to do with this blog is just express my take on current events, my own life, and just those CRRRAAAAAAAZZYYY thoughts that linger in the back of my mind.

I've never been one to rock the boat, or speak out of turn or do anything out of the social norm. And after twenty-something years of feeling unheard, I figured it was time to start speaking.

I recently saw "Les Miserables" in theater and the concept of this blog started to form in the back of my mind. For those of you unfamiliar with the story I would recommend checking out Wikipedia or Google for synopses on the book and musical . As the movie progressed I was kneen to watch one particular musical number.

Do You Hear the People Sing?

Do you hear the people sing?
Singing a song of angry men?
It is the music of a people
Who will not be slaves again!
When the beating of your heart Echoes the beating of the drums
There is a life about to start
When tomorrow comes!
Will you join in our crusade?
Who will be strong and stand with me?
Beyond the barricade
Is there a world you long to see?
Then join in the fight
That will give you the right to be free!
Will you give all you can give
So that our banner may advance
Some will fall and some will live
Will you stand up and take your chance?
The blood of the martyrs
Will water the meadows of France!
Do you hear the people sing?
Singing a song of angry men?
It is the music of a people
Who will not be slaves again!
When the beating of your heart
Echoes the beating of the drums
There is a life about to start
When tomorrow comes!

As the young revolutionists sang this song, an idea came to me.

One voice.

One voice said they did not want oppression.

One voice spoke when everyone else stood silent.

And from one voice, one idea emerged and a whole nation rebelled.

In this world filled where the people are free but not always heeded, how often do we speak up to state what is wrong?

When you see a fellow co-worker or a classmate or just a passerby on the street being singled out and harassed, which of us stands up for them?

When a tragedy hits do we sit by and watch the media coverage or do we answer the call to arms and help in whatever way we can?

But most importantly: Would we give up our life for speaking up?

Do YOU hear the people sing?

Maybe we should all listen more closely...